Anal Sex and Toys
What's all this talk about anal sex?
Is it safe?
Anal sex is an increasingly popular sexual activity. If you decide to dive in and explore this as a part of your sex life, it’s important to understand the risks and rewards.
While you might immediately jump to the conclusion that anal sex is primarily the insertion of a penis as anal penetration, there are in fact quite a range of options at your disposal, including other body parts like fingers and tongue, and there is also a significant range of toys specifically designed to enhance your pleasure in this domain.
Anal sex, like all sexual activity, isn’t unsafe provided appropriate planning, preparation and communication is maintained.
Things to consider if you are going to try it
If you’re curious about anal sex, it’s important to be well and truly prepared before you proceed. First and foremost, knowledge and communication. Understand what to expect, from yourself and, if with a partner, from them too. The more knowledgeable you are, and the more you talk to your partner about the experience, the more likely you will enjoy it.
Here’s some things to know:
The anus lacks natural lubrication
Unlike the vagina, the anus does not produce any lubrication for sexual activity. When a woman is aroused, the vagina provides its own lubricant for sex. The anus, however, does not and therefore it is important to make sure you have plenty of lubricant handy. Ensure the penis, finger or toy is well lubricated before penetration, as penetration without lubrication can tear the delicate tissue inside the anus, potentially leading to an undesirable situation of pain and bleeding.
The anus has a muscle that must relax to allow comfortable penetration
For anal sex, it’s important that the sphincter muscle is relaxed. Not only does it make the whole experience more pleasurable, it reduces the risk of injury or discomfort. Relaxation involves patience from you and your partner. Starting slow, using smaller objects such as small sex toys or fingers may allow the introduction of objects to be staged over time, so you become more comfortable and progress at a pace that suits you.
Just like the rest of our body, the anus has bacteria
Our body contains billions of micro-organisms, of which bacteria make up a large proportion. Bacteria living in or near the anus can be easily spread if you don’t take steps to tidy up after anal penetration.
Best practice is to thoroughly clean any objects inserted in the anus immediately removal, particularly if these objects, such as a penis or toy, are going to be in proximity to the vagina.
If your partner is wearing a condom, be sure to remove it and roll on a new one before moving on to vaginal sex.
For couples considering anal sex, answers to these common questions might help you decide if it’s right for you.
Will it hurt?
If done correctly, there is no reason it would hurt, however as a novice, you may still fumble with getting it right. Remember, take your time, learn to relax into the moment by trying smaller sex toys to begin with. Always stop if it becomes uncomfortable, and be sure to communicate with your partner at all times regarding when it feels good and when not so good, and what is acceptable and what is not. Don’t give up, there are rewards to he had.
Is it normal to bleed?
It’s possible you may experience some bleeding in the beginning. However, once again, if you are taking your time and growing into the experience, there should be no reason for bleeding to occur. If bleeding does occur and grows worse each time, talk to your doctor. This could be a sign of an underlying concern.
Best practice safe anal play
Anal sex can be a great way to diversify and spice up your sex life, whether on your own or with your partner. As suggested earlier, planning, preparation and communication are paramount. If you are looking at this with a partner, make sure the two of you are on the same page about what you would like to do, how and when.
Talk with your partner
As with any new adventure, you need to tell your partner your interest, and let the cat out of the bag. If the feeling is mutual, adventure awaits. If one of you decides anal sex just isn’t your thing, that’s OK. There are lots of options for spicing things up in the bedroom without adding anal sex.
Consider an enema or douche
If you want things squeaky clean down there, you can use an enema or douche to clean the area prior to penetration. See them here.
Lubricate, Lubricate, Lubricate
As discussed previously, the anus does not produce its own lubricant. For maximum comfort and pleasure, make sure you have plenty of lubricant available at all times. Check out our range of lubricants and massage oils.
Trim your nails
Reduce your risk of cutting or scratching yourself or your partner by trimming your nails. Long nails can tear the thin, delicate tissue of the anus, leading to bleeding and potential discomfort. Make sure you wash your hands well, paying particular attention to your nails after anal sex, too, especially before inserting them into the vagina or mouth, to ensure the prevention of transfer of bacteria.
Find a position that works
This may take a few different attempts, but finding that position that works for you is important. Just make sure that your partner is aware of the depth and pace at which he can proceed.
Take your time and COMMUNICATE
Its important every time you intend to involve anal penetration in your sexual experience that you make time (10 to 15 minutes of foreplay) to warm up. This helps you and all the muscles relax, which in turn makes the experience more enjoyable.
Take things slowly, use plenty of lubrication, and stop if it becomes too painful. Don’t aim to have full penis penetration your first time. Try using a finger or a toy, and then upgrade to two or three fingers and maybe a bigger toy. We have a range of scalable (small, medium and larger) toys for you to work you through.
Yes, there will be faecal matter
This is inevitable when it comes to anal sex. Even if you wash or use an douche before penetration, there is a high likelihood of faecal matter being present afterwards.
Clean Up Straight Away
You should never go from anus to vagina or mouth without cleaning up first.
Can anal sex lead to orgasm?
For some people, the anus is an erogenous zone because the anus is full of sensitive nerve endings, so it’s very receptive to any kind of stimulation. For him partner, the tightness around the penis is certain to be pleasing as well.
For men receiving anal sex, the penetrations stimulates the prostate gland in men, which has the potential to dramatically enhance a man’s orgasm. Not every woman will reach orgasm from anal sex, so other more tried and proven methods should still be used to reach orgasm.
The “bottom” line
If you are in a strong relationship where you feel comfortable talking about anything and everything, including what turns you on, or what you’re curious about trying, anal sex is just another way to explore your sexuality.
If you try it and you don’t like it, that’s ok. There are other ways to have fun, spice up your sex life, and enjoy one another. While ever the communication channels are open with honest discussion, you will be sure to grow together no matter what options you choose.